Children and adolescents diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) receive more than just a diagnosis, but a label loaded with stigma toward their abilities and intelligence. Many parents are not educated on the specifics of the disorder, resulting in misconceptions that have a strong influence on the attitudes held toward the child. Children then internalize these negative perceptions held by trusted adult figures, which leads to increased feelings of self-doubt and shame. Parents are encouraged to be fully educated on the specific symptoms of ADHD, as well as the side effects of medication and to properly educate the child and family members on the best strategies for management.

For adolescents in particular, the perceived negative outcome of receiving treatment in regards to side effects and stigma is more important than actual effects of any medication (Ferrin et. al., 2012). Therefore, parents must play a key role in how their child views treatment. Parents are also strongly encouraged to be active in the academic and social lives of adolescents with ADHD, as they have a biologically higher risk of early engagement in drinking alcohol and developing alcohol dependency than not only peers without ADHD, but ADHD peers whose parents do take an active role in their lives (Molina, et. al., 2012). 

Additionally, for adolescents who have already adopted a negative self- concept, attendance in support groups with peers also struggling with ADHD has shown an increase in overall self-worth, perceptions of social acceptance and other related factors (Frame et al., 2003). According to social comparison theory, we compare ourselves to others when we are uncertain about our abilities (Festinger, 1954).  The first step toward ensuring the success of your children is to change the attitudes surrounding one of the most common diagnoses to date.

Here are a few tips to keep in mind:

• Take an active role in your child’s life by doing things that they enjoy alongside them, sitting down for one on one meals with them, and openly talking about things that are going on and their feelings, without inserting too much of your own opinion. Just be curious!

• Put more emphasis, even in your own mind, on the things they are doing rather than things they are not doing. Is your kid doing poorly with math, but spends a lot of time making videos? Foster talents and try not to put too much pressure on deficits. The marks from school are often enough to hurt a teenager with ADHD’s self-esteem, parents don’t need to add onto that as well.

• Emotional reactivity is a symptom of ADHD and also is very common among teenagers. Focus on de-escalation rather than getting into the mix of the content of a fight. If you really think there is a lesson to be learned there, talk about it later when you both have cooler heads.

• There is nothing wrong with your child. Many children have to take medication and become adults that lead incredibly successful lives. When they start getting into self-deprecating talk, make sure they know that, but try not to invalidate their concerns. There are narratives telling them they are dumb and failures by nature of having ADHD in a neurotypical society. Their thoughts make sense, they are just missing the larger picture. After you graduate school, people are much less focused on your academic grades and their talents will help them succeed in life.

• Our #1 tip, however, is for parents to be in their own individual therapy to navigate their individual histories and perception of themselves and their world.

Both children/adolescents with ADHD and their parents can benefit from individual therapy. If you’d like to make an appointment with one of our clinicians, you can check out our bios here or make an appointment below. We look forward to working with you.

References

Ferrin, M., Ruiz-Veguilla, M., Blanc-Betes, M., Abd, S. E., Lax-Pericall, T., Sinclair, M., &  Taylor, E. (2012). Evaluation of attitudes towards treatment in adolescents with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). European Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 21(7), 387-401. 

Festinger, L. (1954). A theory of social comparison processes. Human relations, 7(2), 117-140.

Frame, K., Kelly, L., & Bayley, E. (2003). Increasing Perceptions of Self-Worth in Preadolescents Diagnosed with ADHD. Journal of Nursing Scholarship, 35(3), 225-229. 

Molina, B. S., Pelham, W. E., Cheong, J., Marshal, M. P., Gnagy, E. M., & Curran, P. J. (2012). Childhood attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and growth in adolescent alcohol use: The roles of functional impairments, ADHD symptom persistence, and parental knowledge. Journal of Abnormal Psychology,121(4), 922-935.